Your Weekly Auburn Zen: Championship Edition

The Zen has been a bit on a break lately, but it’s back and better than ever. The timing couldn’t be any better as we are just days away from our fellows in the Plains taking on the Florida State Seminoles in Pasadena. It’s also the day after an Alabama loss to Oklahoma in the Sugar Bowl, so it creates pure Auburn message board gold.

We’ve gathered the best quotes from the boards and placed them all here for your enjoyment. As per Zen tradition, spelling and grammar are in the originals.

"I Think This Game Is In The 40s. Fsu D Going To Get Rattled.Think GuS Is WaitinG To Get Marshall In The Spring Before Passing A Bunch Next Season."

"I think we throw because nick Marshall finally has time to learn the offense and get used to it. He hasn’t had time nor the need to learn to pas"

"Has there been any discussion about practice facilities? FSU is at Orange Coast College which has a new state-of-the-art fitness complex while Auburn is at UC Irvine. I don’t think they even have a football team so I guess they’ll practice at the soccer field?"

"I guess we might as well stop playing games if we’re going to crown Bama National Champs no matter what they do… The media really sucks. It’s like they’ve forgotten that Auburn beat Bama while not even playing our best game. We made just as many mistakes as Bama did."

"ESPN should really stay out of the prediction business. That kind of propaganda by those arse clowns is what fricked us in 2004. Stick to the X’s and O’s and shut the frick up."

"Bama losing will be Christmas come late for the national media. They will spin the loss as the sec not being as strong as advertised, and yet another reason that Auburn will get steam rolled."

"Shows BSPN and others do not care about being right, it is entertainment. 34-28 stripped Alabama of it’s aura of invincability. They have trouble with HUNH offenses. Nick knows that.Also gives me hope, upsets happen on the big stage. Think Central Florida over Baylor.It was a good thing that Bama lost, I was so sick of the ‘they were the best team anyway’ BS."

"I like our chances. Palm trees might be a bit too tall, but those little shrubs in pots are fricked."

"Good luck chucking toilet paper that high. But I’d take the disorderly or disturbing the peace to say I did it if I had nick marshall’s arm."

And finally, the punchline, coming from a fan who has a real beef with ESPN:

"FWIW, on average FSU rush defense holds the teams they play to -29% of their average.Auburn averages 336 yards per game, -29% below that is 239 yards. If Auburn takes to the air then that’s a great number, if not, I don’t like 239. But in that regard Missouri prior to the SECCG held teams they played (SEC mind you) to -35% of their average yards per game. Auburn averaged 318 yards going into the SECCG but ran for 545 or 68% more than their average.Given all of that data, I predict Auburn will run somewhere between 1 yard and a 1000 yards on Monday night."

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