Inside of each of us Alabama fans, a war is brewing. On the outside, we know our deep Crimson leanings tell us our football companions to the south of the state are our mortal enemies. But for many of us, a conscience conundrum has presented itself, for there is part of us that – gasp – is wanting to root for Auburn. To win the national championship.
The likes of such an inner divide were illustrated most profoundly by author Robert Louis Stevenson, in “The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.” Our Bama ethos is being driven by our own Dr. Henry Jekyll, who is battling our evil Auburn-supporting Edward Hyde, who somehow feels that rooting for Auburn is acceptable.
I feel certain that, deep in your subconscious, you are having your own Jekyll-Hyde debate, and it may go much like this:
JEKYLL: I cannot root for Auburn. It goes against the very core of my being.
HYDE: The SEC has won seven straight national titles. Do you really want the streak to end?
JEKYLL: Well, if it’s going to end, wouldn’t it be better to be able to blame Auburn? After all, we won three of the last four, including one without winning the SEC title. Talk about doing the heavy lifting.
HYDE: What about keeping the crystal ball in the state of Alabama for a fifth straight year?
JEKYLL: Did you really enjoy that one year Auburn had the crystal ball? Didja?
HYDE: Think of Iron Bowl 2014. We can conquer our foes once again, and proudly proclaim to have bested the National Champs on our way to a fourth title in six years.
JEKYLL: Think of recruiting right now. Imagine a five-star recruit on the fence. Which impact would you prefer on the lad: Auburn shining in the title game or losing 156-0?
HYDE: What about the recruits that would get for FSU?
JEKYLL: You don’t worry about that. You worry about the fact you’ve actually posted “War Eagle” on Facebook.
HYDE: It’s family. You always side with family.
JEYLL: Fredo Corleone was family, too.
HYDE: Hey, we may hate each other on the field, but at the end of the day, we’re all Alabama football.
JEKYLL: No, we’re Alabama football. They’re Auburn football.
HYDE: Surely there is something we agree one.
JEKYLL: Yes, we hate Tennessee and Florida. And AJ McCarron was rightfully invited to New York for the Heisman presentation.
HYDE: As was Tre Mason.
JEKYLL: Are you actually wearing orange and blue right now?
HYDE: But I just feel like it’s the right thing to do, for the SEC, for the state of Alabama.
JEKYLL: Bear Bryant is going to haunt you.
At the end of Stevenson’s novella, Dr. Jekyll finds no choice but to take out both Jekyll and Hyde, knowing that his transformation into Hyde would be inevitable. Thus, choose your inner monologues wisely. Roll Tide. Go Noles.