The SEC Tinder Game
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Butch Jones – The Kim Jong-Il of the SEC
ALL VOL FANS BOW AND HIDE YOUR FACE BEFORE THE WORDS OF THE LEADER YOU IDOLIZE.
Turn-Ons: EYEBALL SEARING ORANGE, PEASANTS WHO FOLLOW THEIR LEADED UNQUESTIONINGLY EVEN IF HE HASN’T DONE ANYTHING TO EARN THEIR LOVE
Turn-Offs: BEATING ALABAMA, GEORGIA, OR FLORIDA, IMPERIALIST PIGDOG LEADER NICK SABAN
Body Type: FRENCH BULLDOG
Eyes: SQUINTY
About Butch:
BUTCH JONES IS GREAT GLORIOUS LEADER OF TENNESSEE FOR THE BENEFIT AND GLORY OF ALL THE VOLUNTEER PEOPLE. BUTCH JONES IS MOST WINNING COACH IN HISTORY OF COLLEGE FOOTBALL AND ALL OF FOOTBALL, AND ALSO BASEBALL, AND ALL OTHER BALLS, AS WELL AS FIGURE SKATING. BUTCH JONES IS HERO OF MANKIND AND TENNESSEE IS BACK AND WILL RISE LIKE SLEEPING GIANT IT IS LOOK AT MIGHTY NIKE PHOTOSHOPS YOU CAN’T ARGUE WITH PHOTOSHOPS. ALL HAIL MIGHTY BUTCH JONES WHO HAS TOTALLY BROUGHT TENNESSEE BACK AND TENNESSEE IS IMPORTANT WE WON COLLEGE FOOTBALL’S GREATEST HONOR LAST YEAR… THE MIGHTY TAX SLAYER BOWL… ALL HAIL BUTCH JONES THE TAX SLAYER!
What Are You Looking For In A Partner?
THE MIGHTY BUTCH JONES HAS NO EQUAL AND THERE CAN BE NONE WHO CAN BE HIS PARTNER. ALL ARE BELOW THE MIGHTY BUTCH JONES YOU IMPERIALIST CAPITALIST PIGDOG. TENNESSEE NUMBER ONE BEST TEAM IN WORLD MICKEY MOUSE SUPER GO!
What Do People Notice First About You?
BUTCH JONES LOOKS LIKE SEXY BARNEY RUBBLE.
Favorite Band: KID ROCK, HE IS FROM GREAT MICHIGAN LIKE BUTCH JONES AND ALSO BUTCH JONES IS THE BAWITDABA DA BANG A DANG DIGGY DIGGY DIGGY SAID THE BOOGY SAID UP JUMP THE BOOGY.
Favorite Movie: BUTCH JONES WATCH THE WORLDS GREATEST ACTOR MATHEW MCCONAUGHEY EXCLUSIVELY
Religion: THERE IS ONLY ONE MAN YOU SHOULD WORSHIP AND BOW TO AND THAT IS BUTCH JONES. TENNESSEE IS BACK, HAVE WE MENTIONED THAT TO YOU IMPERIALIST WORMS?
Sexual Preference: BUTCH JONES SHALL HAVE LEANN RIMES AS HIS HILLPERSON QUEEN ONE DAY.
A Random Fact About You:
BUTCH JONES ONCE DUNK ON MICHAEL JORDAN BEFORE SLAPPING NICK SABAN AND STEALING TIGER WOODS GIRL WHILE WINNING THE TAX SLAYER BOWL.
If You Could Be Any Animal What Would It Be? BUTCH JONES IS NO ANIMAL, HE IS GOD, BUT HE DOES LOVE KITTENS.
If You Didn’t Do What You Do Now, What Would You Do? BUTCH JONES WAS DESTINED TO LEAD THE PEOPLE OF THE HILLS TO GLORY AND ONLY THAT.
3 Things You Can’t Live Without: MEANINGLESS SLOGANS, VOL FANS WHO UNQUESTIONINGLY LOVE ME WITHOUT ME HAVING DONE ANYTHING, THE GLORY OF THE TENNESSEE EMPIRE
IS BUTCH JONES YOUR GLORIOUS CHOICE VERY GOOD BEST NUMBER FOREVER WIN CHOICE? OR SHALL YOU KEEP LOOKING LIKE A DIRTY IMPERIALIST BAMA FAN?