YOUR SEC TRUE LOVE MATCH IS GUS MALZAHN
I’m delighted that you chose me. Now please put on your orthopedic shoes, your SPF 50, and your sun hat and let’s get to work.
I’ve taken the liberty of enrolling you in public administration, it doesn’t have the most interesting courses, but I think you’ll find them the perfect fit.
It’s these kinds of clerical duties that make my job so much fun, it’s almost as if I’m an accountant of football, always looking for another loophole.
If you get hungry or board you can also always spread me on a delicious turkey and rye to spice up your lunch.
Now I’m off to go look at our new giant stadium TV. Oh the madcap life we live down here on the plains, it’s almost too much excitement.
So are you happy with your choice, or do you want to look around at some other SEC Tinder studs? The choice is yours.